Well, the last time I was able to sit in one place long enough (and use both arms) to update the blog, we had a very specific birth plan set up with my OB. Lucy obviously got wind of that plan and, being a Colliver :), decided she needed to make her own plan.
On February 7, I went to the Fetal Maternal Center for my weekly Non-Stress Test (NST) and Amniotic Fluid Index (AFI). Since I was placed on strict bed rest the Thursday before, my mom took me to these visits. Thank God I wasn't alone this day! My NST went well, except for the random spikes in my blood pressure. Knowing that I was being induced the next day and already on bed rest, the nurse let me leave without another trip to the birthing center. After that, I went into the ultrasound office for the AFI. The nurse who did my AFIs was excited to hear the induction plan and began talking with me about that process. As the ultrasound wand was placed on my stomach, I knew something less than great was coming. Lucy had turned. She was transverse (sideways) again. This was her position of choice until week 35, which means that my uterus probably grew in this shape, making it the most comfortable position for Lucy. However, since she was obviously not head down, I was not going to be induced the next day.
The conversation than turned to a subject I had hoped to avoid. I had research external cephalic versions since Lucy was transverse for so long; however, I really did not want to experience one. If you're not familiar with this process, let me explain. I was scheduled to go to the hospital's birthing center on Friday, February 11. My OB, the perinatologist, an anesthesiologist, and a slew of nurses would manually turn Lucy from the transverse position to head down. There was a 70% chance of success; and if anything went wrong, I would have an emergency c-section. I was told that the process might be painful; I might need an epidural just to have the procedure performed; and if the c-section was emergency, I would not be awake (and Jason would not be with me) when Lucy arrived. Needless to say, I immediately started researching how to encourage a baby to turn head down without this crazy procedure! Here's one source that I read.
That afternoon (still Monday Feb 7), I called the doctor's office back. At this point, I had learned to recognize when Lucy's head was in my ribs (and especially when her feet were at my cervix). It seriously seemed as though she had flipped back into position within the two or three hours of my AFI. Figures, huh? The nurse only told me that I would have an ultrasound before the procedure and needed to wait as calmly as possible until Friday. Well, they did give me another option. I could schedule a routine c-section anytime Wednesday Feb 9 or after. Now, I know plenty of people who have had c-sections and I really hope this statement isn't offensive. I did not want a c-section. I was willing to do anything possible to deliver Lucy vaginally. After everything I've been through to get, stay, and be pregnant, I needed a "typical" delivery. I thought vaginal delivery was better for Lucy and for me-- and honestly, I was scared to death of a c-section.
I tried multiple times to get myself admitted to the birthing center. On Tuesday, I waited until my doctor's office had closed and then I called the birthing center. I talked to one of my doctors (it's impressive when the doctor who ONLY works in the birthing center recognizes you!). I told him that I really felt strongly that my baby had flipped head down. I even mentioned the high blood pressure and maybe fibbed a little, telling him that I felt my BP spiking throughout the day. He attempted to reassure me that if my baby was head down, she would still be that way on Friday and could be safely delivered at the time. Jerk.
So, I stayed on the stupid couch, on my stupid left side, for two more stupid days. Well, I actually ran errands one afternoon, but whatever. I also had to go for weekly Thursday NST. Jason accompanied me, and we were greeted with plenty of nurses asking why I was still pregnant. Good question. I have to admit, I'm really glad I kept that appointment. My blood pressure was higher than ever (I was more upset than ever) and it bought me a ticket to (here's a surprise) the birthing center. My nurse said, as I was leaving, "I bought you this ticket down there, but don't blame me if they send you home". I just said "I'm not leaving pregnant".
Down in the birthing center, I knew the routine. Urine sample, bloodwork, blood pressure reading every 15 minutes, external fetal and contraction monitors. Something was different this time, though- my nurse was AMAZING! I explained to her the happenings from the past few weeks and she offered to talk to the OB. She asked him to check to see if I was dialated, which should indicated if baby was head down. Of course, I agreed. The OB (same guy that only works in the birthing center) came into the room, and recognized me. I remember him saying something about my phone call from earlier in the week. I also remember he said to the nurse, "she wants to know if this baby is transverse and so do I". Awesome! He checked and told me that either my baby was head down or completely breech. She was never completely breech, so I was growing hopeful. He fired up the ultrasound machine and sure enough, there was Lucy, ready for delivery! The OB told me that he didn't trust her to stay in that position, so I was going to be induced that afternoon. I couldn't say anything. I was shaking. I was fighting back tears. Finally, after all these months of visits and phone calls and medicines, I was going to deliver my sweet girl.
The nurses got me admitted, in the LAST room available. The center was absolutely packed and super busy that whole day and night. Another woman came into the center and was supposed to have a c-section; however, there were no rooms open and she ended up VBAC in an EXAM room. I've spent a fair amount of time in those exam rooms and they are super small and highly uncomfortable. That lady had all my sympathy.
Anyhow, I was officially admitted and started on cervidil around noon on Feb 10. My mom, Becky, Donnie, and eventually Jeremy, Laura, and Tiffany joined us as we waited during my "ripening" stage. When I was administered that first dose, my body was not showing any signs of impending labor. Around midnight on Friday morning, the doctor decided that I needed another round of cervidil before starting pitocin. They thought this might help my body, making the time on pitocin shorter, which would be best for Lucy. I agreed that whatever was best for Lucy was definitely the plan.
On Friday afternoon, I progressing nicely and the cervidil had done a perfect job prepping me. As my incredible nurse began administering pitocin, I could feel my body slowly creep into the hell of active labor. Before any of the medicines, I filled out plenty of paperwork, including a waiver kinda thing about the epidural. I told my nurse (and I'm glad this was my plan) that I had no idea what contractions were going to feel like, and I had not ever been in a substantial amount of pain, so I didn't feel good making a decision about the epidural just yet. She explained that even women who deliver naturally have a harder time when they're on pitocin, since it makes everything more intense. I still hoped to go without one.
As my labor progressed and my room filled with visitors, I needed some pain medicine earlier than expected. God bless Stadol. It was amazing. I've only been drunk a few times in my life, but when done correctly, I'm a lot of fun to be around. Apparently, Stadol has that same effect. I remember a lot of what I said, and it was pretty funny, but I would have NEVER said that without my "liquid courage". So, contractions are coming faster and stronger. After a couple hours, I asked for a grape popsicle and another round of Stadol. Shortly after receiving both, I was sitting up in my bed (which I couldn't leave due to the monitors that had to stay on me the entire time) and suddenly I had a very strange feeling. Since I was on Stadol and a bit out of it in general, I immediately thought "oh shoot, I just started my period!". And then I remembered that I didn't get periods, which made me realize that my water had broken. I announced the development and the room erupted with cheers.
A little more time passed. I was warned that the "cushion" of the contractions was gone now that my water was broken. (It seemed like time was moving in warp speed sometimes, and sometimes I thought the clock had stopped working). Anyhow, they were right- no cushion left at all it seemed. The contractions were coming so fast and so strong! When the nurse checked me, I was very close to the transition stage of labor and she said I could get the epidural anytime if I wanted. The pain was so great and I was so worn out for the previous 30 hours, I asked for one immediately.
I was so scared as the anesthesiologist came into the room. But he was so kind and reassuring, and my wonderful labor nurse stayed after her shift ended to be with me during the epidural. Well, during the first one. As my family waited in the hall, I waited one my right side for the pain to go away. My left side felt amazing. However, it seems my spine is slightly curved, which made it difficult to administer the epidural throughout both sides of my body. So, I had a second epidural. Which included 5 more spinal stabs to get the thing in the right place. After the second stick, I was fine with whatever and just wanted the pain to go away. That sweet anesthesiologist took great care of me and refused to give up until I was no longer in pain. It took a little while and I think my husband was having a nervous breakdown in the waiting room.
Things really picked up speed after the epidural. After an hour or so, I had some really intense urges. At first, it wasn't to push- I felt as though I had to pee. The catheter was taking care of that, so clearly Lucy was starting to labor down onto my bladder. A little while later, I had a very intense urge to push. My mom got the nurse, who checked me and then immediately prepared the room for pushing and delivery. Becky informed our waiting room gang that I was going to start pushing. Jason woke up. :) At least one of us slept at the hospital. He was so worn out from worrying about me and Lucy!
Around midnight, the nurse adjusted my bed and taught me how to productively push. I couldn't feel Lucy moving down much and I felt really discouraged as it didn't seem I was getting anywhere. Except exhausted. For the first time, I thought I should have elected the c-section. Honestly, I was really at the end of my rope. I couldn't do anymore. I had been in the birthing center and laboring for almost 37 hours. I had one meal and maybe 5 hours of sleep. I was scared and exhausted. And then, the nurse told me that I was pushing perfectly and with two more pushes like that, she would have to bring in the doctor. Around 12:45, the doctor, delivery nurse, and baby nurse came into the room. My mom, Becky and Jason took their positions and helped me as I delivered the sweetest little angel ever! At 1:12am, Lucy Belle Colliver entered the world. That problematic umbilical cord was loosely wrapped around her neck three times. Clearly, she was flipping like crazy inside me. She didn't cry right away; not until she was put on my chest. Not what the doctors would call ideal, but it was fitting that she waited to be with me to take her first breath. I remember feeling so overwhelming happy. No, that doesn't even describe it. It was so much more. It was a joy that I didn't know existed. My sweet husband and my perfect baby were all I saw. I know God put together this perfect family for me. I thanked God for my girl. I thanked Jason for my Lucy. I even thanked the nurses and doctor (who heard me without his hearing aids).
As Lucy was getting cleaned up and checked out, I remember informing my mother and Becky that I had a baby. I sobbed and repeated over and over "I have a baby! I have a baby! I have a baby!". I had a 6lb, 11.4 oz baby- 20 inches long. Full head of dark brown hair. Pitiful, perfect little cry that stopped when she returned to me. We were apart for about thirty minutes as she was cleaned and held by her Daddy, Nana Becky, and Grandma Lisa. During that time, I was repaired. I'll leave it at that.
Lucy stayed in my arms almost all night (well, morning). I refused to sleep. I refused to let her go to the bassinet. I needed to stare at her, memorize her face. And I informed Jason that I didn't have a baby to let her lay in some bassinet. Around 5am that morning, Lucy had her first bath. She hated it (and still does), except when she had her hair washed. She loves that part!
I dressed my sweet girl in little sleepers. We struggled to find clothes that fit her. She still doesn't fit into 0-3 month clothes. She is now growing too tall for newborn clothes. And she has now outgrown her preemie sleepers, though that's what she wore mostly in the hospital.
When we were discharged on Valentine's Day, Lucy's jaundice level were getting higher. We were scheduled to see a nurse at home the following day. As Lucy and and our dogs got used to one another, we were also challenged to get Lucy to breastfeed. Also in the hospital, we asked the pediatricians about her frenulum. That's the membrane that connects the tongue to the lower part of the mouth. When a frenulum extends further than usual, it's referred to as "tongue tied". Lucy was born tongue tied and the pediatricians assured us that it would not have any long term effects on her. Well, they were right. No long term effects; just short term ones. Lucy struggled to latch and nurse, which restricted the amount she was eating, which restricted the amount eliminated, which increased the bilirubin levels. By Tuesday, she was a very high (potentially dangerous) jaundice level.
We saw OUR pediatrician (not the same ones as the hospital) that afternoon. She immediately agreed to clip Lucy's tongue. Scary for mom, painless for baby and so helpful! After that, the pedi got the bilirubin levels and told us that we needed to decide to either spend the night in NICU with Lucy or take home the phototherapy blanket and lights. Since Lucy was struggling with eating and especially peeing, we elected NICU. After a loooooong night under the lights (and out of my arms), Lucy's jaundice was flushed out and she was looking, feeling, and eating much better.
Since then, things have slowed down. Now, we have the typical parents of a newborn look about us. We haven't slept much, and for a few days, we were fighting with one another due to the exhaustion. However, that went away, we're on the same page now. I'm doing my best to provide as much milk as possible for Lucy and Jason is super supportive. We knew breastfeeding would be difficult, as I couldn't get pregnant due to my prolactin levels. That's the same hormone that creates breastmilk. After six months of repressing my prolactin levels, my poor body seems highly confused. Lucy is bottle-fed as much breast milk as possible, and supplemented with organic formula. And this plan is working really well. Last Thursday, our girl weighed in at 7lb, 7oz. And I'm willing to bet she's around 8lb now, as she's starting to growing out of her newborn sleepers. My sweet pea is funny though- none of that weight seems to be going to her little tummy, just her cheeks and loooong legs!
Thanks for keeping up with us during this incredible journey. Despite the challenges and the pain of delivery and postpartum, I can't wait to be pregnant again! We look forward to welcoming Lucy's little brother(s) or sister(s) in the next few years. For now, we have our hands full with this little bug... and we couldn't be happier! I'll try to do a photo blog sometime soon. And from now on, I'll update Lucy's progress once a month. Stop by and visit (our blog or our home) anytime! :)
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